


Where Do You Think You're Going?

by matimae



Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Whump, Gen, Whump, Whumptober 2020
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-05
Updated: 2020-10-05
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:41:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26804545
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/matimae/pseuds/matimae
Summary: Dirk Gently is caught in hell on earth, once again in the cold entrapments of Blackwing.((takes place during s2e1))
Relationships: Dirk Gently & Scott Riggins, Farah Black & Todd Brotzman & Dirk Gently
Comments: 4
Kudos: 12
Collections: Whumptober 2020





	Where Do You Think You're Going?

**Author's Note:**

> written for whumptober no.5 (on the run, rescue)

Dirk Gently often had fantastical dreams. With rushing colors and vivid emotions and people and action, his dreams were like another world, with much less danger than his own.

Dirk Gently _also_ had fantastical nightmares. Not of the horrid creatures he fought or of the bloody massacres he's witnessed, not even of the people he lost along the way.

No, Dirk Gently's nightmares always took place in the same location. Starting in the same room. The same white walls. The same jumpsuits of dull gray.

Blackwing.

But nightmares were infrequent and would fade over time and when the sun came up and he was alive and free his heart rate would settle down and he would remember that it was all just a part of the past. Blackwing was just a distant, slightly unforgettable, memory.

Until it wasn't.

Blackwing had taken him again. And Dirk would like to say it wasn't true, but Blackwing had also taken his hope, his soul.

"Look alive, sunshine!" hollered a guard from across the impenetrable glass.

Dirk didn't even move his eyes in his direction. He was tired. He was done.

"Show us your powers _detective boy,"_

Zapping from the room's frame engorged the area and Dirk couldn't say he wasn't surprised. They've done the same electrocution trick every other morning. Guess he found the pattern. Good for him?

"You need to give us something!"

_Then you need to give me something!_ Dirk almost spit out. But he had no fight left in him, they had stolen everything from him.

It had been months now that he had been reintroduced to the horrors of his childhood through the daily testings and overall 'hospitality' of Blackwing. Day 63 now, to be exact.

Dirk is tired. So, so, tired. Tired of the tests, tired of the alarm that would wake him up in the morning, tired of life. If he could have his way, he just would keep sleeping, and sleeping… but the guards were amendment on keeping him on schedule.

So, when Dirk was finally tucked on top of his 3-inch flat mattress, he was determined to get every ounce of rest he could, ignoring whatever distant clanging was coming from down the hall. He didn’t care.

Until he couldn’t ignore the sound anymore, and he shot up in his bed. Head swiveling to see what was going on in the dimly lit room. Overhead of him was a woman with dark hair and wild eyes.

_Mona._

“What are you doing here?” Dirk asked, a smile daring to cross his face.

She leaned over to him, inches away from his face, and whispered, “Find the boy,” before dosing him from the neck up in water.

Dirk fell into darkness. Mona’s voice echoing in the back of his mind. _She had saved him!_ She gave him a case, and she gave him hope.

A thousand things are going through Dirks mind, everything is dark and cramped in here, and he had never been one afraid of small spaces, but the claustrophobia was kicking in, he couldn’t deny.

He was stuck in something. A box? A coffin more like... It was all still shit. Nothing matters. He had thought he had escaped but now he was just in a new, smaller, darker, prison. Everything is over. It doesn’t matter if it’s all connected- it’s all bullshit.

Dirk ran for years and he still ended up back in that place. Even if he was out, Blackwing had a grip on him and no one could release it.

Tears were welling in his eyes but he wasn’t going to cry, he wouldn’t let them have the satisfaction. He banged his fist against the side of his new miniature prison, letting the building rage steam over and spill out into his fists. After he hit the wall a few times he heard some give, _he might get out of here after all!_

As he wound up for his next hit, the wall flew open. Dirk squinted in the straight sunlight and climbed out of what he could now see was the boot of a car. Stumbling over his own two feet he took in the scene, plains of farmland stretched on with a winding country road in the middle. It was beautiful. The most beautiful thing he had ever found.

A wide grin of disbelief spread across his face as his welled up tears started to fall, this time in relief. “I’m free! I’m _FREE_!”

He spun around, still caught up in his delight it took him a moment for his mind to even process what he was seeing, Todd and Farah, standing right in front of him.

Moments of pure bliss ensued as they reconnected, Dirk didn’t know that a hug could feel so good. Feel so _safe_.

…

Dirk was safe. He was out of Blackwing, and he never had to see that place again. And yet he still felt like he was there, under their rule.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

Dirk looked up into the hallway, seeing Riggins leaning against the wall, arms crossed in front of his chest. He looked just like he always did. Except he wasn’t here. He couldn’t be- Dirk knew that.

“You’re not real.”

“That doesn’t matter.” the Riggins his own mind had fabricated took a step towards him. “Because what is real is that you are a nobody and Blackwing is what makes you a somebody.”

Dirk hates himself for how quickly he is on the verge of tears. Will his demons always follow him?

“No. I may be a nobody, but Blackwing has nothing to do with anything. You do not get the credit for who I am, or what I do.” Dirk spit out angrily.

Dirk could hear Farah and Todd approach from behind him and quickly wiped his eyes. Looking back up, he saw an empty spot where ‘Riggins’ was standing.

“You alright, Dirk?” Todd asked.

Dirk could tell he was earnest. They were good people, he was lucky to have them. Unknowingly or not, they help fight his demons.

Because _he wasn’t Blacking_ and you know what? He _wasn’t a nobody_.

He was Dirk Gently. Holistic Detective.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading! <3


End file.
